I struggle with being a control freak. This comes out when there is a problem at home. If there is a problem; I want to find the quickest solution to the problem and get it fixed as quickly as possible. Sometimes this is a great quality to have, other times it causes undue stress.
For those of you that don’t know my wife and I just had our first child, who we named Jenna Lynne. Now even though she has only been in our lives(out of the womb) for about two weeks she is already messing with my control freakyness(made that word up).
Now Jenna cries just as all babies do and there are times when we know exactly why she is crying. There are other times when we have no idea why she is crying and this bothers me, becasue as I said I am a control freak/problem solver. When I can’t figure out why she is crying; I get stressed. And this is bad. Now Jenna should be able to rely on me when she is in need but as she grows she will come to find out that sometimes I may be unable to help her and this will be an opportunity for her to turn to God.
This is exactly what I am having to learn to do. I think I have prayed more in these last two weeks then I have all year. If I am holding Jenna then I am many times praying for her and her mom and I. This is forcing me to admit to God that I have no idea what I am doing; thus giving up control.
I hope that I can continue to give up control; becuase ultimately it is one of the healthiest spiritual exercises.